Record details

• ISBN: 1617222348
• ISBN: 9781617222344
• Physical Description: 114 pages ; 22 cm
• Publisher: Fort Collins, CO : Companion Press, [2015]
• Copyright: ©2015

Content descriptions

Formatted Contents Note:

Introduction. Grieving a military death - Suicide in the military - About TAPS - How to use this book -- Bonnie's story -- 100 ideas. Understand what it means to be "traumatized" - First, seek safety and comfort - Be aware of post-traumatic stress - Understand the difference between grief and mourning - Be aware that grief affects your body, mind, heart, social self, and spirit - Understand that grief following a traumatic death is particularly difficult - Allow for numbness - Conside yourself in "emotional intensive care" - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 1: acknowledge the reality of the death - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 2: embrace the pain of loss - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 3:Remember the person who died - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 4: Develop a new identity - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 5: search for meaning - Understand the six needs of mourning. Need 6: receive ongoing support from others - Know that grief does not proceed in orderly, predictable 'stages' - Don't expect yourself to mourn or heal in a certain way or in a certain time - Take good care of yourself - If you saw the body and its injuries, give yourself time to conjure up happier memories - If you weren't able to see the body, find other ways to acknowledge the reality of the death - Use language that empowers you - Ignore hurtful comments - Reach out and touch - Keep a journal - Let go of destructive misconceptions about grief and mourning - If you are a fellow service member, get extra support - Embrace your need and right to grieve and mourn - Believe in the power of story - If this death has put your family in the media spotlight, appoint someone to handle media inquiries - Keep in mind the rules of thirds - Be honest with the children who mourn - If you are grieving what will never be, share these thoughts and feelings - Know that you are loved - Express your spirituality - Identify three people you can turn to anytime you need a friend - Reset your clock - Lean on - and beware of - your resilience - Use the name of person who died - Turn to your family - Turn to social media to help you mourn - Organize a memory book - Embrace the image of the eagle - If you feel angry, find appropriate ways to express your anger - If you feel guilty or regretful, find ways to express it - If you feel stuck, find ways to get unstuck - Know that it's OK not to forgive - Breathe - Work through financial stresses - Write a letter - Deal with personal effects in your own time - Share your dreams about the person who died - Pray - Don't stress about thank-you notes - Visit the cemetery - Wear your story - Examine old hurts - Gather new memories of the person who died - Befriend eight universal healing principles - Be aware of "grief overload" - Establish a memorial for the person who died - Be the hero - Cry - Visit the great outdoors - Take a healing field trip - Remember others who had a special relationship with the person who died - Laugh - Be aware of how military people and places affect you - Be a civvy - Discover resources available to surviving military families - Prepare yourself for the holidays - Create a sanctuary just for you - Find a grief "buddy" - Don't be caught off guard by "griefbursts" - Volunteer - Spend time in "thin places" - Accept that there may be no answers - Watch the sun rise - Look for the surprises and gifts in your day - Look into support groups - Create a shadow box - Say no - Watch for warning signs - Release any ambivalence or regrets you may have about the funeral and burial - Seek support on anniversaries - Schedule something that gives you pleasure each and every day - Capture your loved one's story - Talk to a counselor - Take a mini-vacation - Pay attention to synchronicities - Think positive - Give yourself a push - Draw a "grief map" - Live for both of you - Express your gratitude - Believe in your capacity to heal - Seek your higher self - Teach others about grief and mourning - Imagine your reunion with the person who died - Understand the concept of "reconciliation" - Choose to live - Strive to grow through grief -- A final word from Bonnie -- A final word from Alan -- Resources.

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Subject:

Bereavement.
Families of military personnel > Counseling of > United States.
Families of military personnel > United States.
Grief.
Loss (Psychology)